For Love or Convenience?

The other day I heard an interesting conversation on the radio. The question posed was “do people marry for love or for convenience?” My initial reaction was for love of course! But the more I thought about it, the more I began to lean towards the argument of both.

When you are a child, you pretty much “date” your classmates. You have no car, no money, no online dating account (hopefully) and no way to scout out other prospects. You see your classmates everyday, eat lunch together, play together and even share mutual friends. The ultimate convenience. However, as you get older you gain access to OPTIONS. With the complete explosion of social media, your options now seem limitless. You can connect with someone across the country and turn a single DM into a life long romance.

Even with access to so many options, you may find yourself in a relationship for convenience. Let me explain. Sometimes, when you are comfortable and have been doing something for a long time, its easier to keep doing that thing than to stop. For example, if I don’t cook on Sunday, I find myself eating out the entire week. That’s because once I have allowed myself to take the easy way out which requires no planning, no cooking and no cleaning, its easier for me to continue this trend that to change my pattern mid-week.

How does this apply to our relationships? If you have been in a rocky relationship for two years, it may be easier to stick it out than to break up. You have adjusted your life, exchanged resources and maybe even combined friends. Who would want to give all that up to start over?

Or maybe you got into a relationship to fill a NEED. Loneliness, financial problems and heartbreak are a few examples of reasons we often get into relationships.

“This person is not right for me but at least I’m not alone.”

“I don’t have the money to take care of my children, so I’ll stay with him a little while longer.”

“I just got out of a bad relationship, I just need someone to talk to.”

Be careful who you connect with in a desperate situation. I want to challenge you to love intentionally not just conveniently. Your relationships and your marriage will not always be easy. When you choose to love someone you make a conscious decision to put in the work required. When you are whole spiritually, financially and physically, you have the sober mind required to sustain a healthy relationship.

Our relationship with Christ.

Our salvation is more than an emotional experience. We may have been led to Christ by a desperate situation, but it takes intentionality to stay in His presence. Oftentimes we may call on the Lord when we are sick, hungry, broke or afraid then leave as soon as our needs are met. Our relationship with Christ grows as we intentionally choose to love Him.

So today, LOVE on Purpose!

#love #marriage #relationships